50 Days in the Life of a Mid Life Business Mentee - Days 7-9
Teachers are Leaders
Like I said in my last post I was working in Rome as part of a crew to support a large training event.
This is unpaid and I'm frequently asked why I do it.
I do it because people did it for me when I participated at the event.
I went to Italy because I'd never been there before and because my friend Simona invited me to her 'special' birthday celebrations. I missed the celebration but managed to spend a bit of her birthday with her, but that's another story.
The other reason I crew at training events is so I can learn from the trainer, yes, but also about myself in different contexts.
By now you all know that this year I've been doing things that take me out of my comfort zone. And this experience certainly did that.
I don't speak Italian so I was limited in what I could do directly with the participants. I couldn't be on the registration desk and I couldn't handle sales.
So one of my jobs was to take care of the Gold seats - meaning I had to ensure only Gold ticket holders (lanyard wearers) sat in the Gold seating area (normal chairs with white covers). I also had to ensure they each had a snack package which included a bottle of water and biscuits in the morning and chocolate in the afternoon.
There were 14-16 Gold ticket holders who saw me at the end of every break for 3 days.
By day 3 guess how many of them had said hello, or good morning, or thank you?
Yes 4 people. 1 of those 4 engaged me in conversation - I think he may have been the only one who spoke English.
Guess how many of the other 5 smiled at me?
Mainly because they never caught my eye. In fact I don't think they even saw me.
I didn't like how that felt.
And I say this not to judge because I'm not sure I have been any better in the past.
One of the greatest benefits of crewing is it keep me humble but more than that it makes me reflect on the type of person I want to be. So I had think about the people I take for granted. The security guards in the shops I got to, for example. And since I've come home I make a point of at least catching their eye.
Are there people in your life that you need to 'see'?
The other big lesson I learned was about the trainer/teacher I want to be.
Blair Singer, my teacher and mentor, says 'Teachers are Leaders' and my observations of the trainers that led this event showed me the kind of leader I don't want to be.
I want to be the kind of leader that not only acknowledges but values the people who come out to support me.
I want to be the kind of leader that says hello and sees the person they are saying hello to.
I want to be the kind of leader that doesn't assume that what they have to say and do is more important than that of the people who support me.
I want to be the kind of teacher you believe in. The kind of teacher that is truly there for the participants and the kind of teacher who leaves her ego back in the hotel room.
That's the kind of teacher/leader I like to think I am. I'm not sure if I'm there yet, but my experience in these three days shows me how easy it could be to fall short of that.
Blair talks about the duality in ascension. The more you rise, the more powerful you become, the more magnified your nature becomes. So as the best of you grows, so does the worst of you. Sometimes the worst comes out in the way you treat yourself and other times in the way you treat those around you.
I treasure these experiences that remind me to be careful, to remain humble and to constantly review who I think I am and if that is congruent with how I'm behaving.
In the last couple of days I read somewhere (I can't remember where), how important it is to allow yourself to see the things you admire in others in yourself. I think it's also important to be humble enough to allow yourself to see the things you dislike about another in yourself and try to correct it.
So I'd like to thank the people that prompted me to re-visit how I'm showing up to different people.
Maybe you'd like to try it?